The Creator of the universe remains in charge today, as always. Kings and countries are set up and taken down by the same God who woke you up this morning. So, while happiness and disappointment are good and natural reactions to the results of elections, fear and anger have no place in a wise and understanding heart.
When we blame our neighbors for electoral disappointments, we are putting them in the place of God. This faulty thinking only leads to division. Instead of blaming others, we should thank God for the good outcomes that we don’t deserve. And we should humbly accept His chastening judgments as right and just. This both calms anxious hearts and enables genuine love for political opponents.
A democratic republic has many blessings. It also is a heavy burden. When every citizen is called to participate in voting, it puts all of us in the position of judging others. The vote helps every elected official to be held to account. But that blessing comes at a high price.
It means that for months now, friends and family, pundits and politicians have been trying to persuade one another about what to say and how to vote. The rancor reaches a crescendo on Election Day. As we learn how little control we truly have, desperation grows. Words become sharp and cutting. Neighbors injure neighbors. Friendships become strained. All of this is the result of people attempting to exert power over one another.
So, one of the blessings of the post-election season is that the citizen’s responsibility for judging candidates and persuade others has largely come to an end. Laying aside that burden lowers blood pressure and eases conversations.
Today we are freed to put the spotlight back where it truly belongs. Judging others always carries with it the threat that we are distracted from judging ourselves. While the judiciary must now do its solemn duty to judge disputed races, we are free to return to the work of self-examination and self-control. That task is what self-governance is truly all about.
Now, it is time to focus on what we—not others—should do to make this a better world. We have far more power over self-control than we ever had over the votes of others. Not only that, but every success in self-control will be a thousand times more rewarding than controlling others. Therefore, everything that we have been trying to persuade others to do we should now focus on doing ourselves.
With this general principle in mind, allow me to suggest three specific actions.
Start with a simple act of hospitality. Think about people who disagree with you and take them to lunch. The purpose is not to change minds. It is simply to humanize them. People meeting face-to-face in hospitality give the gift of self. Such personal conversation cannot be matched by emails, social media posts—even hand-written letters. In short, it builds and rebuilds personal relationships based on a common humanity.
Speaking of rebuilding, here is a second post-election activity. Now that the pressure is off, you have the gift of hindsight. Think over recent weeks and ask yourself if you wrote, re-tweeted or shared anything that you regret. In the heat of efforts to persuade others, it is always easier to feel attacked than it is to notice your own attacks.
Guided by self-examination, go to people face-to-face and apologize. Just apologize. Don’t remind them of what they first said to you to deserve it. No “buts,” “ifs,” or “maybes” are allowed here. A sincere and unqualified apology has power beyond your wildest dreams.
Finally, while you are reflecting on your angry words don’t kid yourself into thinking that other people caused your anger. Your anger is your own. Don’t blame the victim. More often than not, that anger is caused by the media you feed yourself.
Talk radio, cable news and social media are designed to manipulate you with “rage porn” in order to gain market share. They cynically poison your relationships for profit. Turn it off and tune it out. Refuse to be turned against your friends and family for the financial gains of others.
After months of trying to control things that are out of our control, today is a day to step back and see how we ourselves have been controlled. As the fog clears, we can see more clearly and renounce the power of manipulation. That opens the way to the power of love.
If building a better world is your goal, you won’t get there by controlling others. The greatest power for changing the world is to control yourself.
Also published in the Wyoming Tribune Eagle, November 6, 2020.
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