Life, Lies, and Love: 40 Days for Life

Tomorrow, September 28, is the kick-off for the semiannual “40 Days for Life” campaign. This nation-wide event happens twice each year. It is a time to focus on the sanctity of human life from conception to natural death. This year for the first time, Wyoming has participating sites through the work of former state legislator, Bob Brechtel. 

There are several ways that people can participate in the 40 Days. You can take time to think about the myriad of life issues, educate yourself and others, or pray. You could even travel to Casper or Laramie and participate in person (for details see: 40daysforlife.com). My own preparations led me to think about a much broader picture—beyond abortion, beyond euthanasia, beyond embryo-destructive research. I have come to see being pro-life less and less as a burden on the living and a restriction on freedom. Quite the opposite, I increasingly see it as freedom, and permission to follow our human hearts. 

It is extremely unfortunate that the national debate over abortion has been cast in terms of “rights” and “choice.” How much better it would be if we could be talking about “gifts” and “freedom.” As long as we are talking about rights and choice, we are in the realm of power. One person tries to exercise power over another. Do my rights trump your rights, or do yours trump mine? Should your choice take away my choice? Or should mine negate yours? Cast like this, it is impossible to decide. 

Power is a zero-sum game. The more of it I have, the less of it you have. The same goes for choice. If choice is about doing absolutely whatever I want, then your choices cannot possibly be absolute. Wherever our desires come into conflict, one of us must lose.

No wonder the issue is so hopelessly contentious! With the battle lines drawn this way, even the slightest concession to principle or civility is a loss. In fact, this is a snapshot of our entire problem. Whether we are talking about LGBT rights, or ethnic rights, or the right to life, or the right to choose… you name it, the entire conversation starts out on the wrong foot. 

We pit one person against the other in a winner-take-all contest, then are surprised when people take from each other. We square off against each other in a fight to the death, and then are aghast that people actually kill each other! The problem is the paradigm.

But what if this paradigm were an illusion? What if there was a way to live in which we weren’t competing, like rats, for our share of the pie. What if our deepest human desires could never come into conflict? What if, instead, the more authentic you were to your own life, the more life everyone else had. What if true freedom never impinged on someone else’s freedom -- if exercising your full freedom meant everybody else was more free, not less? 

What if we were designed so that in seeking what is best and right for us, meant that everyone else also got what was best and right for them? More to the point, what if you could be certain that by seeking first and only the best for your neighbor, from least to greatest, it would always turn out best for you as well?

(Photo: Weheartit.com)

Too good to be true? Not at all. In fact, in the most foundational events of human life, we see it every day. Consider a mother and her newborn child. All the child wants is the sound of his mother’s heartbeat, to snuggle against her warm skin, to hear her soft voice, and to feed from her breast. Meanwhile, what does the new mother desire most? To snuggle with her newborn, to feel his soft skin, to gently coo in his ears, and for him to feed from her breast.

It’s a perfect, complimentary, fit. The needs of one are supplied by the desires of the other, and visa versa. They are not TAKING FROM each other, but GIVING TO each other. In a moment like this, we ordinary humans, get a glimpse into heaven. We see love. And in love, we see, even if only for a moment, the way things were meant to be. 

And it’s not just the love between mother and child. We see it in any type of love. The love of husband and wife, father and daughter, brother and sister, mother and son, and love between friends are all distinct and different from each other. But each in its own way shows us a little glimpse of the human ideal. In these glimpses of the divine, there is no question of rights or power, there is only the mutual recognition of each other as gift, and the desire to serve the other, purely for the other’s sake.

Of course, these are only glimpses. These tiny sparks of pure love are awash in a big black sky of selfishness, anger, frustration, fear, hatred and a million ugly emotions and desires. All of these fears and worries draw us away from love and turn us upon ourselves. They cause our survival instincts to go hay-wire and grasp for ourselves what can only be attained by giving.

But none of this blackness disproves my point. Even when we are grasping and selfish, we do not feel good about it. And no matter how forcefully we grasp, or successfully we acquire, we can find no satisfaction and no peace. In the end, the very fact that we recognize such behavior to be ugly proves that we all aspire to the same beauty, the same humanity.

So, if there truly is a life where desires are not in competition, where you can fulfill your own needs by taking care of everyone else’s needs, it is the life of love. It is a life of renouncing selfishness, perverseness, hatred, robbery and every other vice, and living as if others matter most and if I matter least. This kind of life renounces demanding rights and arbitrary choices, and thinks only of which choice is RIGHT for my neighbor and what I can give him freely.

Against this, is the fiendish lie that your freedom and mine are mutually exclusive. This is the most inhuman subversion of our true interests. It makes people think that by doing the exact opposite of their heart’s desire, and taking from their neighbor, they will benefit by it. But the lie cannot deliver. After throwing all decency to the wind and robbing someone of life, liberty or happiness for personal gain, we find that we still haven’t gained what we thought. We have only robbed to no avail, making more misery, but no beauty.

So, during these 40 Days for Life, it is time to recognize that the real struggle is not my desires against yours, but my evil desires against my noble desires, your high aspirations striving to overcome your base impulses. In this light, it is not a struggle against one another, but against the grand lie, against the inhuman forces of evil. The real loss of freedom comes when my noble desires are enslaved to my selfishness. Only when we see this can we look for the keys which set us free from these chains. 

Understanding this, can open our minds to consider how we can encourage one another in fulfilling their deepest noble desires. Let’s find ways to come together and take away the fears, worries, pressures and pain which drive us out of our true humanity and into the realm of unfulfilling, selfish grasping. 

And let the encouragement begin with you. Affirm and uphold the noble desires of people you meet. Help them win their personal struggle. Give of yourself to take away their fears. Confess your sins against them to take away their anger. Give them permission to be the loving human being they were created to be in full assurance that they will have what they need. Give them permission to receive the people-gifts that have been given to them. And as you give these things from yourself, watch how you are fulfilled in the giving.

SOGI Laws and a Free Society

 (Photo: Nick Oza, The Arizona Republic)

Recently, a federal judge in Fort Worth, Texas blocked enforcement of the letter of “guidance” sent by Obama’s Department of Justice and Department of Education. That is very good news.

This notorious letter, sent last May to schools across our nation and state, would have forced them to allow boys in the girl’s room and to share hotel rooms on trips or face federal punishment. Now we have a reprieve, at least for a while. 

By putting on hold the craziness which would have been unleashed in our own schools, this injunction will allow our children to be safe while attending school this year. It also shields them from being pawns in the culture wars. And it gives us all time to understand, reflect upon, and participate in the law making process as free citizens.

Let us use this time wisely. My hope is that we can be quit of the ever-present cat calls of “bigot” and “homophobe.” Such jamming does nothing to raise understanding or win hearts. It is fear-mongering at its worst. These issues deserve better. 

So, let’s begin by asking three basic questions. First, what laws are being proposed? Second, how are they being proposed? Third, what will happen if these laws are passed?

What is being proposed?

The central issue in the bathroom wars are so-called “SOGI” laws. “SOGI” stands for “Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity.” Two new legal categories – “sexual orientation, and gender identity” – are created and insert them into laws, ordinances, or policies about discrimination on the basis of “sex.” It changes current law in two major ways. 

First, it fundamentally alters the way that we understand the relationship of body and the person. Current law considers the physical realities of the human body (sexual organs, hormones, and DNA) as the focus of the law’s protection. To protect the body is to protect the person. But SOGI theory denies any real connection between body and person. It holds that only the mind (psyche) is the object of law. This explains why SOGI laws tend to sacrifice the bodily safety of girls and boys, affirming feelings instead.

As a direct result of this change, wherever SOGI laws take effect, First Amendment freedoms are rolled back. Laws have always restricted the way we use “sticks and stones” because they “may break my bones.” But we were careful not to restrict free speech. After all, “words will never hurt me.” But if my body is not really “me,” legal power must now restrict any words that might contradict my psyche. Religion, philosophy, psychology, biology, all must give way to the individual’s private ideas. 

How are they being pursued?

The Department of Justice and the Department of Education tried to reinterpret “sex” as “sexual orientation and gender identity” by merely issuing a memo, skipping the law-making process. By such executive fiat, or its twin sister, judicial fiat, much SOGI policy has already entered into public life.

But the constitution requires that laws be written by the legislative branch. Here, elected law-makers, in a process of give and take, carefully craft laws to balance all competing interests. In Wyoming, SOGI laws have been introduced into our legislature several times. Each time they have been voted down. Most recently was the contentious debate over SF 115 in February, 2015. This bill quietly passed the Senate by a large margin. But once the public weighed in, it was defeated in the House of Representatives. 

This year, Wyoming Equality, one of the main lobbyists for SOGI laws, turned from the state house to our towns and cities. They succeeded in getting Laramie to pass a SOGI ordinance. Since then, they have tried in Jackson, Cheyenne, and Casper but have stalled in the face of strong local opposition. Two sub-issues which contribute to local resistance are: 1) the lack of any religious exemptions – even for churches themselves; and 2) the criminalizing of free speech. 

Just as it is easier to pass a town ordinance than a state law, it is also easier to write SOGI language into the by-laws and rules of smaller agencies. The reason is simple. The fewer people involved in the process, the easier to slide it through.

This is exactly what Wyoming’s Commission on Judicial Conduct and Ethics has done. Even while SOGI legislation was being turned down by our state’s lawmakers, the Commission was introducing this language into its Rules of Conduct. By the way, it has also happened in a few county school boards (including Evanston). 

What will happen if SOGI laws are passed?

(Photo: Freedomworks.org)

People of good will can argue until the cows come home about what might or might not happen as a result of a certain law. But there can be no argument whatsoever as to what HAS happened wherever SOGI laws are in effect. Some may like the results, others may not. But we have enough evidence to know exactly what the results will be.

For over a decade now, we have watched other states, counties, and municipalities set up SOGI policies. Wherever this has happened, we have seen ordinary, law-abiding people have their lives turned upside down. Elane Photography in New Mexico, Arlene’s Flowers in Washington state, Masterpiece Cake Shop in Colorado, Hands On Originals in Kentucky, Aloha Bed and Breakfast in Hawaii, Sweet Cakes by Melissa, in Oregon, and the list could go on and on. 

All of these people were charged and fined. Most lost their businesses. Many were harassed mercilessly. Some lost houses or retirement savings. What holds all of these cases together is that they were each prosecuted under newly-minted SOGI laws. 

I am not, here, going to rehearse the details of each case. You should look them up for yourselves. I only point out that none of these would ever have happened unless their town, county, or state had first passed SOGI legislation. Whether you think their punishment was just or unjust, too much or not enough, is beside the point. The point is that SOGI laws provided the only possible conditions for the destruction of these businesses. 

While those cases happened elsewhere, Wyoming had not been bothered by anything similar – until now. Then, true to form, it was SOGI policy that brought it about. In 2009 the Wyoming Commission on Judicial Conduct and Ethics revised their Code of Judicial Conduct. Unbeknownst to most Wyomingites, they added the phrase, “sexual orientation” at key places. Few people thought at the time, that these revisions would play out the way they have. 

Least of all, Judge Ruth Neely of Pinedale. After 14 years on the bench and even being on the committee that rewrote the rules, she did not anticipate how these SOGI revisions would be used to bring her to the Supreme Court. But they did. Neither Wyoming state law, nor Constitution provides any justification for prosecuting Judge Neely. The entire case rests upon the newly minted SOGI language in the Code of Judicial Conduct.

So there you have it. SOGI laws work wherever they are tried. They make it possible to punish anybody who still dares to speak and act as if bodies matter. They make law based on theories, not established by science. They set up an unnecessary competition between one person’s internal psychology and another person’s free speech.

So the next time you hear of someone being dragged before a state equality commission, don’t just cluck your tongue and sadly say, “well, they did break the law.” Ask yourself who, exactly, passed this law? Was it some judicial, or executive fiat? Was it some obscure commission flying under the radar? Is it based in scientific reality, or in new psychological theories? Do I, personally, support this law? If not, I should be working to fix it in order to build a better community.

Laws do not simply exist. We make them. In a free society there is no saying, “well, I personally wouldn’t have fined them $135,000, but that’s the law.” No, that wasn’t the law until people like you and me wrote it that way. If you, personally, are troubled by some draconian punishment, then you, personally, are obligated to speak against it. 

That is “government of the people, by the people and for the people.”


For Further Reading:
Petition, Preserve Freedom, Reject Coercion
Focus on the Family, When Sexuality Trumps Religious Freedom
Breakpoint, Religious Freedom and SOGI Laws
Public Discourse, SOGI Laws
Christianity Today, Fairness for All

Remembering 9-11

This coming Sunday will mark the 15^th anniversary of 9-11. I can still refer to it that way and most of you will know what I am talking about. It was that bright and crisp September morning when our world changed. I am referring, of course, to the attacks in Pennsylvania, Washington, and New York, and to the 2996 people who died that day.

Most of us know this, but not all. Those twenty and younger likely have only a vague recollection of adults gaping at TV screens. Maybe not even that. But, strange as it may seem, this year’s freshmen, the class of 2020, is generation for whom 9-11 is pure history. It happened before they were born. 

They can learn about it only from others.

This is a reminder that if 9-11 is not rehearsed, taught, and remembered, our children and grandchildren may never even have a clue about perhaps the deepest seated experience of your life. Memories aren’t passed down automatically. Unless they are kept alive, they will be distorted and lost. Already the internet is full of conspiracy theories and falsehoods that are just plausible enough to mislead the uninformed. Anniversaries give us an occasion to tell the truth.

So let me briefly rehearse the story. Four airplanes were hijacked and headed toward four different targets. Two were aimed at New York, two were aimed at Washington. Three hit their targets—the North and South Towers of the World Trade Center (WTC), and the Pentagon. The last plane was literally wrestled to the ground outside Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

At 8:46 am in New York, Flight 11 struck the north tower of the WTC instantly killing all aboard plus hundreds of people on the 93-99th floors of the tower. For seventeen minutes, America was trying to understand how such an horrible accident could happen. But at 8:03 am when Flight 175 struck the floors 75-85 of the south tower we instantly knew that this was no accident.

It took until 9:24 for the FAA to learn that there were two more hijacked planes still in the air. Interceptors were scrambled, but before they could reach Flight 77, it smashed into the western side of the Pentagon instantly killing all 59 aboard and 125 souls in the building.

Then, at 9:59 am, the unthinkable happened. Millions of Americans were glued to the screen and thousands of New Yorkers watched from below as the South Tower of the WTC collapsed upon itself in a surreal slow-motion. Nobody in the tower survived.

Meanwhile, a takeoff delay meant that Flight 93 has not yet reached its intended target. When her passengers learned the fate of the other hijacked flights, they took action. Todd Beamer and a group of determined passengers fought the hijackers in order to prevent themselves from becoming the fourth human missile of the day. But their heroism came at high cost, they were unable to avoid crashing in an empty field in Pennsylvania at 10:07.

Finally, at 10:28 am, the North Tower of the WTC cascaded to the ground. The first struck was the last to fall. In the course of 102 minutes, four passenger airlines, three major buildings, and almost 3000 lives were destroyed.

In the spring of 2014 I visited the memorial. It centers on two square waterfalls built in the exact place of the original towers. Each cascades into a bottomless hole and is surrounded by the hollowed out names of 2984 victims. The names include 2596 adults who perished in the two towers, 10 unborn children who died in their mother’s wombs, 246 passengers and crew of four airplanes, 125 killed in the Pentagon, along with 7 victims of the first attack on the twin towers in 1993.

As I contemplated these names, a man in uniform noticed me and asked where I was from and why I was there. Our conversation immediately revealed that he was more than a security guard. The emotion of his voice betrayed him. It led me to ask him directly, “Where were you on that day?”

He stopped talking.

Turning to his right, he lifted an arm and pointed. “Right there,” his voice quavered.

He was walking on the sidewalk below the towers when the first airplane struck. He heard the engines, looked up and saw the impact. And then he ran. Ran from the falling debris. Trying to get to safety.

But something drew him back. He came back to help. People wounded from falling glass, airplane parts, tiles. He gave first aid as he was able and helped others to get away from the scene. Then he heard the sound again. Another impact.

Still he continued working, continued helping. When the South Tower collapsed, he was shielded from the debris and dust by the still-standing North Tower. It was time to leave.

None of us can possibly fathom what he experienced that day. And yet, he was only one of thousands. He wasn’t the only one to flee the danger. He wasn’t the only one to come back and help. He was only human. Drawn by some unseen force that compelled him to think about more than his own survival.

It is the same force that made him come back ten years later. Even though he survived, he volunteered to be security guard at the Memorial. He has made it his mission to keep the memory alive. For him, for the people of New York, the 9-11 memorial is not just a park, not just a fountain, not just a sculpture.

The 9-11 memorial is a graveyard. Of the 2606 People who lost their lives fifteen years ago, more than 1000 were never recovered. They were pulverized and indistinguishable from the tons of concrete dust. For their family and friends who had no body to bury, Ground Zero is their final resting place, hallowed ground.

Behind the Beeman-Cashin building Evanston has its own 9-11 memorial. It would make a fine destination for you and your family to keep this history alive. Although the steel girders are not from the towers themselves, they have been carefully placed to resemble a portion of the rubble. While you are there, notice the two tall aspen trees which symbolize the WTC towers. See the apple trees that form that backdrop in memory of the Pentagon and the Pennsylvania field. Remind yourself and your children of the events of 9-11. Tell them why it’s important to you.

In this way, you can work to keep alive the memory of the power of evil, the resilience of the human spirit, and that curious force at work in each and every one of us that draws us to respect the bodies of the dead and set aside our own survival in order to help others.

After all, it’s only human.